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Your Father’s Story

Through blogging, I’ve been introduced to some fabulous brands and companies that have become family favorites and places we turn to for holidays and gifts. I’m excited to have discovered a new one that brings together three things I hold dear–family, heritage and stories–and I’m thrilled to share them with you today. This Father’s Day post is sponsored by StoryWorth. If you’re still looking for that perfect something to give your dad this weekend, there’s an offer for the most meaningful gift at the end of this post. 

Last Father’s Day, I asked my dad if he’d be interested in writing a guest post for Father’s Day. “Tell a story about your dad,” was the simple prompt I offered, but in no way was I prepared for the story he’d tell, the mystery of a complicated love story between father and son I had never fully understood as his daughter. I remember the night he e-mailed it to me–how he called to tell me he had sent it, said he was going to bed and offered to fix anything I wanted edited in the morning. And late that night, I read it–and cried, hearing for the first time so many stories I had never known. How my grandpa hugged my dad when he helped him with his neck ties, how he didn’t come to my dad’s theater shows, how my dad pretended it didn’t bother him that he wasn’t there. And I finally learned something I had always wondered–something we could never quite get to in face-to-face conversations. I learned that his father’s love, like so many others, was complicated but deeply understood–rooted in story after story, from tucking money in kitchen cupboards when he knew my dad was barely scrimping by, to loudly cheering from the cross country field even when he was the last to finish.

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It is these stories that keep my grandpa alive and near to me–and the telling of these stories that connect him to my children, their future children and the heritage of who we are as a family. The older I get, the more I yearn for these stories for more intimate relationships with those I love most. It’s why I keep a box of table topics in our kitchen and make everyone go around and answer story-telling questions for holiday dinners. Who impacted you most growing up? Tell us a time you failed and learned something from it. And you know what I’m learning? More about our family than I could have ever learned in day to day conversation.

I’ve especially loved how these stories have made me learn about and love Brett’s side of the family lately as I find myself collecting more stories my father-in-law shares, better appreciating my husband’s heritage and the family name I now carry. One of my favorite stories emerged this past Christmas when I asked everyone to go around and share their most favorite holiday memory from when they were a child. Had the story prompt not been given, I don’t know I would have ever learned about the magical night Brett’s dad remembers from years ago when he stayed with his Grandpa Omar for an evening in the middle of winter. He recalls long after the moon had risen and the grand kids were headed for bed, his strong quiet grandpa peeked out the window and called to his wife–“Lucille, get them ready,” before slipping out the door. The night was cold and black and silent, and he didn’t know what was going on, but he bundled up as his grandma instructed.

“When we headed outside, we saw it had been snowing for hours,” Brett’s dad remembers. “He had hitched a sleigh to the horse was waiting for us. We all climbed in and huddled together, and he took us on the most beautiful moonlit sleigh ride through the snow.” Brett’s dad is a great storyteller, and he recalls every detail as if it happened yesterday–how dark the sky was, how bright the stars twinkled, how cold the night felt, and how his grandpa–like always–didn’t say much but loved through action.

“And the snow–” he recalls. “There was so much snow, I’ll never forget it.”

I got a little teary as he retold the story. All these years, all this time, and he still remembers it like it was yesterday. The story is part of him, passed down to us, and coincidentally about the man whose name my son now carries.

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Our stories make us known to those we love, and when we know our people well, we can love them better. Not only that, research shows the more you know about your family’s history, the more sense of control you have over your life. From a favorite article about family stories I read a few years ago in the New York Times: “The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative.”

So here comes the treasure hunt. How do we uncover these stories? How do we find out all the things we never knew we wanted to know about our parents and grandparents, and preserve and pass these stories on?

I love StoryWorth’s answer to these questions: make it easy for them.

What is StoryWorth? StoryWorth is a service that provides a selection of questions you can choose from–questions such as”What simple pleasures of life do you truly enjoy?”, “What’s the best advice you’ve ever gotten?” or “Who are your role models and heroes?”–questions that beg for hidden stories. Each week StoryWorth emails the questions to your dad (or grandpa or whomever you choose as a recipient), and when your loved one replies (written or recorded), his answers are shared with you. After a year, all of his stories are bound in a beautiful keepsake book. And you get to know your father better. 

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StoryWorth is a perfect meaningful gift for Father’s Day, one you can purchase last minute and still have it be personal and special. And this Father’s Day, StoryWorth is offering one year of service of collecting your dad’s stories along with a hardcover book for $59 ($20 off original $79). Customize your gift invite today and StoryWorth will email your dad on Father’s Day explaining how to get started with your meaningful gift.

And let’s face it–everyone loves a gift that benefits the giver too. Your father or grandfather will love the invitation to tell his stories, but you get the gift of hearing them. And that’s a gift that lasts forever.

Comments

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  1. Kelle, this is so awesome. Both the stories that you shared and this service. xoxo

  2. You are so right. Stories are the key to bringing families closer. So often we see our parents a certain way, judging them for their actions and decisions, but once the stories are told, understanding follows pushing away the judgement. I love hearing stories of my family and sharing with my kids the stories of my life.

  3. I read your father’s words when you originally posted them and thought they were so beautiful. Reread again today and was blown away all over again. The tough times in Orlando and in my life lately are softened by this kind of sharing of the human experience. Thanks much to you and your father.

  4. This is a great post! Your words are always so eloquent. There is a company I follow on Instgram called @basecampcardco and they make playing cards that have questions on them that you would love. We have a great time camping with them and chatting with the kids and friends about whether they would want to be a dragon or a unicorn and other fun questions.

  5. Very thought provoking post. Great gift idea.

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