on patriotism

i love july 4th.
the fireworks. the sparklers. rummaging through the closet to find something red, white and blue. the fact that it lines up perfectly in the year when blueberries and strawberries are at the peak of their seasons so that together nestled between pillows of whipping cream, they concoct this festive little treat without even trying.
and while my celebratory heart wants to do it all, after the long parade this morning, a family swim and a bbq at papa’s…well, the nausea was in full-gear and i was totally shot so sadly, we skipped our fireworks show on the pier this year and opted for neighborhood fireworks which, shall i say, were quite fabulous.

and come to find out, little miss is terrified of the booms anyway this year and after a few deathly grips on her daddy’s shoulder and some huddled tears, we decided indoors is where she belonged tonight…that and our driveway for some sparklers.

oh, but the parade this morning was just divine. and i don’t know what it is about the fourth…or maybe this blessed mix of cry-derman genes and pregnancy, but oh did i cry. the sight of flags and soldiers and babies in stars and stripes…the marching bands and drums and sheer realization that huge masses of people across our country come together like this to celebrate our independence and gratitude for freedom…it just gets me.

i think having babies makes me so much more aware of patriotism. and, no matter how far we have to come in this country, there is this deep sense of gratitude to live in a place where my children are safe and free and supported and loved and guided toward a rich, promising future. and that didn’t come without a cost.

happy independence day.

eggs & such

so…and i like to start with so…the child that lives within is happy. because it’s easter. and blessed easter childhood memories resurface…of skittle-colored eggs. sunday morning service. new tights and white patent leather shoes with ankle straps (and crying when i couldn’t find the other one and finally clip-clopping out to a honking car with mis-matched shoes and an ugly cry face to skid away just in time to make it for my dad’s sermon). ham dinners and digging through plastic easter grass to find one more jelly bean. my mom’s rice crispy treat baskets with green coconut and licorice handles. it is confection at its best…and the one time of year i actually enjoy pepto bismol pastels.

…and also motherhood. because, as much as the deep foundation of this amazing “profession” resides simply in loving…there are these splendid bonuses. like watching your pig-tailed ‘lil cubby tediously scan the lawn for eggs because this year, she’s big enough to be a part of the neighborhood hunt.

like swelling inside when she clings extra tight in fear of the easter bunny but pulls away for just a moment to wave at him. like watching her decorate bunny crafts with the other kids and wondering where the time went.

like feeling my throat tighten when two people asked, “is she the baby that sat in the grass with the bunny ears last year?”

yes, she is and she’s oh-so big now.

we love easter. we love watching rows of crisp white eggs transform into sweet orbs of cotton candy-ish confection.

…and i’m well aware of the bitter fact that there will soon be a day when she won’t need security from the easter bunny. when skittle-colored eggs aren’t the highlight of her day. when she refuses to wear pig-tails.

but for now…it’s just bless-ed.

we like easter. and bunnies…like i almost walked out of the pet store the other day with a real one. and then i thought what am i doing?

happy almost-easter.

oh wait…

our easter card this year…

front…

inside…

back…

have a great weekend!

~k

oh, valentine.

i gotta hand it to hallmark. creating a day all for love? genius.

and in that spirit…the spirit of love…i am loving

~the return of running. repeated enough consecutive days now that i can call it somewhat consistent. and i have a blister to prove it. a blister, mind you, that could have been avoided had i found some socks. and i realized that blister was evolving at about the sixth repetition of let it rock, the only song which i was permitted to play being that i didn’t know austyn’s ipod passcode to change it. so, i let it rock alright, and from this day forth, i won’t be able to hear that song without thinking of the rhythmic pounding of my feet to the beat, a left toe blister and a very, very chafed right ankle. moral of the story: wear socks.

~the fact that i didn’t have a meltdown when i realized there was no half & half left for my coffee this morning, a discovery that would, under otherwise un-valentiney circumstances warrant a calamitous response…one that involves a crazy night-gowned lady knocking on neighbors’ doors. i’ve done it before. but today’s about love. and i love the ingenuity i brainstormed with some melted old whipped cream.

~watching my wedding reception dvd yesterday and feeling a bit of a throat-tightening…and the reassuring comfort that i married my best friend and that i love him very, very much.

~the interaction her new toddlerhood grants us–everything’s more animated, more thought-out and just so much more enjoyable. she is more than my girl…she’s my little friend.

~my nook. it’s just as good as it looks. my cozy spot i retreat to at the end of the night. such a happy place.

~getting older and all the little pieces of wisdom, of gratitude, of happiness i glean from every experience i’m blessed to call mine. seriously…i think about it all the time. just chiseling away every day to sculpt the best version of me i can.

~girls night last night with a trip to the theater for he’s just not that into you (splendid, by the way) and then retreating to the ale house for some soul cleansing womenfolk chat.

~her dimple which is magically finding more ways to reveal itself these days.

~free “love scroll” from world market which happened to make the most lovely canvas for brett’s valentine letter.

~watching her attempt to blow bubbles yesterday…





~getting valentine packages in the mail from my mom. she sends ’em every year. and, ever since we were little, she has made every little holiday oh so special.

~wake-up cuddles with sophie.

~the way all the dogs hang out by her table when she eats in the hopes that maybe…just maybe…they might catch some scraps.

~having more than one valentine…just so many to love. including my little heart.

~love. yup…just lovin’ love itself.

have a very happy valentine’s day.

~k