Our fall this year was initiated by our spontaneous trip to North Georgia where, for two weeks, time stood still in a picturesque cabin by a lake, and I got to enjoy this completely unexpected vacation with the kids. It brought to light every wonderful thing about each of my kids at this phase of their lives, and I clung to little moments like Nella falling asleep in my lap or Dash still reaching to hold my hand on that trip with utmost gratitude...”Don’t move, Time. Everything stay the same.” When we returned, upon realizing that Irma roughed things up a bit while we were gone, I had the added pleasure of discovering that Brett decided to get rid of our little kids’ table and chairs.
“It takes up too much room,” he explained, “and they’re bigger now, so they can just use the kitchen table.”
In typical fashion, ruled by unreasonably overactive sentimentality, I took some deep breaths and made it a much bigger deal than it is. “This feels like a huge decision,” I argued, “We’ve had a little table in our house since before Lainey could walk. I mean, I can’t believe you just got rid of it without discussing it first.”
I’ll cut to the chase, and give you the moral of the story: I hang on to things pretty tightly–moments, keepsakes, people, time. The benefit of this is that I love deeply and taste every drop of goodness that is intended for us to feel. The drawback of this is that not wanting to let go can sometimes stunt my growth and keep me from moving to bigger and better things intended for me to feel.
I thought of something my sister told me when Nella was born, meant to help me accept challenge, of course, but I think it pertains to good moments as well: “I keep picturing a river with this crazy rushing current. You can hang on and get exhausted struggling to just stay alive, stuck to that rock, or you can let go and be carried by where it’s going to take you. You have to let go, Kelle.”
The great thing is, you can still enjoy every bit of a good moment riding the current as you can clutching that rock, hoping the moment stays forever. In fact, you can enjoy it more when you let go.
There is no more little play table in our living room, but there’s more room to play.
And this season, I’m riding the current, letting go of my grip and free-styling my stroke in the current.
Enjoying lately…
All day pajamas on weekends…
Butterfly dances…
Fall colors…
After school treats…
(Anyone else sprinkle cinnamon and sugar on leftover pie crust and bake them? The best.)
Frogpocalypse friends…
(Naples frog population seems to have quadrupled this past year)
Autumn candles…
Weekend entertaining…
And a DOUBLE COLD FRONT in Naples this weekend! Our doors are open, the kids wore sweaters to school today, and we had our first fire of the season last night. In honor of all this fall goodness, I’m sharing two fall playlists I put together. Those two weeks we spent in Georgia reignited my love for old jazz as every afternoon when we returned from our sight-seeing adventures, we played records from our friends’ vinyl collection and cooked dinner, sipped wine and watched the sunset from the back porch. I’ve always loved “old soul” music, but I’ve been listening to it non stop in our home since we got back, and it sets the perfect cozy tone for fall. My mother-in-law was so inspired by our music scene there, she came back from the trip and promptly bought a turntable and several old jazz records to begin her collection. The second playlist is more folksy–an acoustic playlist that makes me want to smoke a pipe and sip bourbon outside a log cabin, and I don’t even smoke pipes.
I have one rule for listening to these though: light some candles first.
Enjoy!
FALL OLD SOUL
FALL FOLK & ACOUSTIC
Terra says
I love the rushing river metaphor. I’m a “hanger on-er”, too, and have a tough time letting go of objects or moving on from what is comfortable. This is a great reminder that letting go helps pave the way for new experiences and things. Thanks for sharing!
BIjou says
Not the little table! I refuse to let mine go and would be horrified if that decision was made without me. Same with the play kitchen- nope.
cindy cole says
No just no on the Brett getting rid of the table without talking it over with you first….Unless it was a total piece of junk….better watch out…what will it be next. Love your fall post!! Love this chilly weather in the south!
HeatHer micheels says
I get it. Our six month old hasn’t been in the bassinet for months, but I can’t bring myself to take it down out of our bedroom. And I need to be the one, it cannot be my husband .
I would love a post on tips to keep clutter down! Every time I turn around, a small toy is set on the table or counter. My kids are 5 and 3, but tips to come closer to your cleanliness and organization appreciated. Although, if it requires getting less sleep to stay on top, I’m out for now. 🙂
Nicole Hardesty says
Kelle!
I loved your sister quote about the river’s current when I read your book after my daughter Brooklynn was born last year. I read the book about this time last year and can’t believe how far Brooklynn and I have come. I thought I was strong willed but the quote reminds me that we need to let go at times and be directed toward a beautiful new path. Love to see Nella and RUby…and all the possibilities that will be available to my girl Brooklynn
MS says
Not to fan the flames, I would be livid about that table. Lol. I’m mad on your behalf because it IS a big decision.
Anyway, with that said, I’m a fan of your husband normally. He seems to have such a loving way with the children.
Brandi says
The river metaphor struck a nerve. So awesome! Okay, now I need your candle recommendations because these playlists are going to be on repeat in my home. 😉
Roxana Conroy says
Love your pictures! What camera do you use? Any thoughts on the Canon PowerShot SX 60 HS?
Sara says
My mom use to treat me to the cinnamon and sugar sprinkled leftover pie crust – we called it “Johnny Crust” still a favorite for me and now my kids too!
Paula says
Ah, thanks for reminding me, I must find my ‘apple’ scented candle. When my kids were little I would sew them Halloween costumes. The candles burned day and night as I worked. My 27 year old walked in the house last fall, smelled it, and declared ‘it must be Halloween’. So you see, you don’t have to keep things in order to have special memories of their childhood. I loved the day I freed our house and yard of all things plastic. I never looked back ladies. It was a process that I was forced into when we added an addition on the house and I had to pack things up and store them for 6 months. Tough decisions were made but I don’t have any regrets. This was driven home when my father-in-law passed away earlier this year and I watched as my husband and his sisters struggled with emptying their childhood home. I do not want to do that to my kids! It’s a goal I work at every day. It gets easier. Heck, I actually get giddy when I sell, donate or give something away!!! Still have the hand sewn costumes tho… I hope someday I will have grandchildren who will want to wear them.
Happy Fall!
Mama K says
I used to struggle greatly with the “stuff of childhood.” Due to unfortunate family events in my childhood, I do not have a lot from my younger years so I would hold onto everything for my kids. Seven years ago, all that became nothing following the unexpected stillbirth of our second son at eight months. His death is what led me to your blog initially in a desperate search for comfort, healing and trying to find some way forward through the pain and grief. Having to tell our oldest children their brother would not be coming home (they were 8 and 4 at the time) was the defining moment of our life. Nothing else mattered except that we would survive and keep our family together, fighting to help each individual make their way through the hurt. I seized on creating memories and moments no matter how small. It has not been easy and we all still struggle from the trauma of his loss, but I know we are stronger than before because of what we have endured. I feel your pain on the loss of the table. In the end tho, your life, love and memories will remain forever in the hearts of your children because you are so good at teaching them, and those around you, to enjoy life, and not just things.
Kelle says
Thank you for this beautiful perspective and sharing this. I’m so sorry for your loss.
RenEe says
I can’t exactly pinpoint what it is about this post that almost moved me to tears, but I know my reaction means it was something I needed to read today. I’m also going through a renewed love for old jazz and love this playlist!
christine says
Thank you Kelle. Fall is glorious in most parts of Canada….but today in Winnipeg, it dropped to -1.
We are familiar with cold so luckily I love nothing more than creating a warm, cozy environment for my kids. Tonight we lit candles, read under quilts and sipped cocoa with your playlist in the background. So thoughtful of you to share that compilation – thanks.
Robin in Michigan says
Love the playlists… Not only did I follow the two you just shared but I followed a bunch more. Thanks for sharing your perfect playlist and those moments when life at home isn’t quiet so perfect.
Vero says
Thanks Kelle! I am loving the playlist! please will share a Xmas playlist as well for us Xmas obsessed!
Erin says
Yes! Agreed! Please make a Christmas/Holiday playlist!!
LeeAnn says
Thankyou for sharing your playlists! I’ve been loving the music in your stories! I feel your pain with the table, I am literally sitting here looking at a pink dolls house that my 11 year old rarely played with and grew out of a long time ago. I have unearthed it to clean it up and sell amd I already know it’s going back in the attic… it’s not the dolls house itself that I’m afraid to say goodbye to, but those days that I’ll never have again . I’m glad I’m not alone in these feelings ❤️
I’m now away to pop the kettle on amd listen to some jazz.. thankyou x
Molly says
This was the perfect thing for me to read today! I was going through Wally’s too-small clothes and it was hard to not want to keep everything!! I love the playlists too, thanks! xoxo
Diane says
Work just got a lot better for me – playing your playlist today. Billie Holiday makes the day fly by!
Krystal says
Another beautiful post. I’ve been playing your Fall playlist all weekend and it’s so fabulous. Are you inspired to share your holiday/Christmas playlist with us so we can start playing it on Wednesday?! 🙂
Krystal says
No worries – found yours from last year!
Nadine Rhoades says
Oh ouch, I would have been smoking over the table and chairs also, like keep them for the grand kids!!
Stacey says
My kids are 19 and 14. I understand that certain pieces of their childhood seem sacred to one parent and not the other, I get it.
That said, my husband would be a tad irritated if I broadcasted to the masses whenever he did something that I didn’t like. Whether it be getting rid of a child-sized table, ordering shoes/popcorn popper/etc. on Amazon or even sending kids to school with hair that might’ve gone a day too long between washes. Poor Brett is doing his best here. One day soon, your children will be on the internet and read everything that’s ever been written—good, bad or otherwise.
Kelle says
Stacey,
Thank you for taking the time to write this comment and for offering your response.
Of course we choose only bits of our lives to go on social media, but these little marriage bites are actually purposely chosen and approved by Brett. They are often the same bites that we laugh about in big groups and retell when out with friends. There are an equal amount of things (actually, probably more :o) about me that Brett rolls his eyes over, and that I share here on social media too–my car’s a mess, I get super cranky minutes before company arrives and start barking for people to help me clean, he trips over my shoes daily, etc. These are not shameful things to any of us; they are what marriage is and what I personally think there needs to be more of on social media. Hopefully, if I’m doing it right (and I may miss the mark sometimes), you’ll see that love and commitment from me and Brett trump these silly pet peeves and trump them HARD. And I hope that I don’t hide all the hard moments so good that when my kids look back at memories, they don’t see a perfectly crafted storybook representation of marriage that makes them wonder what the heck is wrong with their own. There are many struggles and victories in our family that never make it to the Internet, but I happen to like the few that have been shared. That popcorn maker? Best roll-my-eyes Brett purchase ever.
Donna says
I totally agree, Kelle. You do a fantastic job of writing.
Sara says
May I recommend some exceptional folksy, autumn-worthy Canadian talent to add to your playlists? 🙂
Heathen Eve (https://heatheneve.bandcamp.com/releases)
Raine Hamilton (http://www.rainehamilton.com/listen/)
Ruth Moody (http://www.ruthmoody.com/discography/)
Kelle says
THANK YOU!!