Enjoying the Small Things

Enjoying the Small Things

The Great Big Chicago Christmas Post

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For the third year in a row, we escaped this past weekend for a heavy dose of holiday memories to a city that pours out festive feels from every corner, every storefront window, every street musician.

My kids look forward to our Christmas weekend in Chicago as much as Christmas itself, but this year perhaps no one was excited about this trip as much as Lainey. Her best friend Maggie moved to a Chicago suburb over the summer, and while the loss of her presence here has been patched over with FaceTime calls and daily texts, technology has nothing on the hug they shared an hour after we arrived and the three days that followed that included these two joined at the hip.

Christmas in Chicago musts for us include:

State Street Macy’s window displays.

Numerous stops for hot chocolate while we sightsee.

Riding the train.

Pictures on my friend’s apartment stoop.

…and so many night walks where we point out Christmas trees in windows and look for parties and pick which front door decorations are our favorites. We imagine the stories that are written in all the buildings we walk past, and my dad provides an ongoing soundtrack with the portable speaker he keeps in his pocket, full volume–all the Christmas carols, all the time.

New favorites this year:

Tea at the Drake Hotel with our friends and Brett’s sister (who is moving to Naples in just days, and we are so excited!).

A night time carriage ride through the city (we used Antique Coach & Carriage Co., just outside the old Water Tower). We all loved this one so much and will definitely do it again.

You bundle up beneath blankets and ride through the most festive streets, even a little stretch along Lake Shore Drive. We sang Christmas carols while the kids hollered to onlookers various holiday greetings that, I’m sorry to say, included “Tooty Christmas!”, “Happy Toots!” and “We Wish You a Merry Fart!” (followed by hysterical laughter).

Macy’s Santa. We’ve never attempted Santa in Chicago before because the lines were too long (because it’s the REAL Santa) and Nella isn’t much for seeing him face-to-face, but I was on a one-on-one date with Nella and ventured down to the enchanting Santa Land in Macy’s where Santa was visiting. I thought maybe we’d just check it out, but we came during a time when there were no lines, so I pushed it a little further, standing in line and suggesting we’d just “look at Santa.” not sit with him. When it was our turn, the red velvet curtain pulled back to reveal this magical festive nook and the kindest Santa, straight from the North Pole. When Nella was hesitant, sweet Santa suggested I sit with her alone while he walked away. Once she was comfortable, we asked if he could come back and she said yes. I asked if I could step away to take a picture, and she nodded yes again. And then Santa reached for a book and asked if he could read it to her. I didn’t think to check my camera settings–just started snapping. Magic, I tell you.

I don’t know how I missed the little playground tucked right next to the fire station near Michigan Ave all these years, but I’m so glad we found it this year. It was warm enough that the kids could actually enjoy a good half hour playing there before our next cocoa stop.

Another favorite this year was Christkindlmarket, an open-air German holiday village full of gift vendors and German food. I enjoyed my first (and hopefully not last) cup of Glühwein, the most delicious hot spiced wine, and picked up some keepsake treasures.

At the Bean, it was surprisingly warm enough for the kids to take off their coats for a bit.

Even though we didn’t end up with snow, we feel so lucky to have enjoyed such beautiful weather when we’ve experienced brutal winds on this weekend before. The sun allowed for more outdoor exploring.

And when the sun went to bed and the cold came creeping in, we made my favorite memories–the indoor kind, not dependent on what the city gave to us but what we brought to it.

Our wonder…

…our dance moves…

…and the suitcase of things we packed to “make it special.” Snowmen marshmallows for cocoa, a Christmas puzzle, our favorite jammies, card games and a candle that smells like a Christmas tree farm.

My dear friend lets us stay at her family’s apartment, and so many of our most memorable moments on this weekend happen inside this special place, set up with toys and so many little personal touches.

I think we could have skipped the city adventures altogether and let Nella play in this secret nook the whole weekend, and she would have been perfectly happy.

We’re smitten with this city and so grateful to tuck away another weekend of December memories together here.

…and even happier to come home to be together as a family, where we belong.

xo to you and yours.

Fun Gifts for Everyone on Your List

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This post is sponsored by TJMaxx.com

It is a true fact that the answers to many of my not-really-problems-but-let’s-just-call-them-that-for-the-sake-of-this-post have been found in the aisles of T.J.Maxx. Like the replacement for my too-short tablecloth, for instance, that I found in the home aisle one Saturday afternoon when I wasn’t even looking. Or the perfect gift for Nella’s friend’s birthday party–two picture books and an art set–not to mention a gift bag to wrap it in ten minutes before the party began, in my car, of course. Affordable exercise equipment to build a home workout area, shoes that don’t break the bank, a phone case so I can dispose of my cracked one and–surprisingly one day, tucked away on the beauty shelves–natural kid shampoo that made me giddy to find. This is what I love about T.J.Maxx–they offer a treasure hunt of products and gifts in just about every category you can imagine, particularly creatively inspiring for gift givers this time of year. Even better? They offer everything you love about T.J.Maxx stores online, so you can go treasure hunting without ever leaving your home.

I did this last week, heading to my office with coffee and a little hope to knock some gifts off my list, and I had so much fun clicking around TJMaxx.com to find beautiful gifts (and lots of brand names we love!) at an incredible value. You can use their category titles as guides or dive into some of their curated lists to find unique finds you might not have thought of — gifts for her, gifts for the fitness enthusiast, hostess gifts or gifts under $50.

I was looking for a teen girl gift, a stocking plush for a friend’s daughter, a small gift for a creative friend and some stocker stuffing inspiration for Brett. If you look, you shall find because look what I found!

Teen Girl: brand name record player, a vinyl to go with it and a letter board for her room. I got so excited when I found this not only because I know how much this music-loving teen will love this but because it was such a great value (I’ve seen how much these cost on other sites!). I went ahead and pulled the packaging off the letter board so I could write a little note on it and tie it all together to make the gift look pretty.

Stocking Plush: I love having some plush animal or doll be the finishing touch on a stocking. They always look so cute peeking out. I’m picky with plush though, drawn to sweet details and handmade goods. Those kind of plush can be expensive though, so imagine my excitement when I found this gorgeous doll (made in India) for less than $20.

If you type “plush” on T.J.Maxx search bar, you’ll find so many unique finds for kids. Okay, or adults.

Brett’s Stocking: I thought this one would be hard, but it was the easiest one to shop for. TJMaxx.com basically offers a cornucopia of cool guy stuff to fill a stocking from gadgets and games to underwear and socks. You can never go wrong with rolled up underwear in a stocking.

Creative Friends: One of my favorite things T.J.Maxx does well is offer a great selection of “little gifts”–candles, journals, books, art inspiration, earrings, pretty dishes, etc. that work great for small tokens of appreciation to friends, hostesses or teachers. We like to give generous gift certificates to our teachers at Christmas, but it’s harder this year with Lainey because she has so many teachers in middle school; and the amount we usually give in elementary school is not possible x 7 for one kid. Nella has a lot of assistants and specialists who work with her as well, so there’s more people to gift. Small thoughtful gifts work perfectly, and we find so many great things at T.J.Maxx. A book on creativity, a journal and a colored pencil set, all tied up with ribbon? Affordable, thoughtful and fun to give.

Anything you purchase on TJMaxx.com can be returned for free at any T.J.Maxx location, free shipping is available for orders over $89, and hundreds of new arrivals are added to the T.J.Maxx website each week, so you’ll find fresh gift inspiration every time you shop.

Our family has long been big fans of the T.J.Maxx treasure hunt, and having one more way to shop (in your pajamas, from your couch!) makes it better.

If you need a little gifting inspiration, check out their incredible values and have some fun poking around their site. There are so many great toys for kids too–I wish I had more really small ones to shop for because I saw so many unique toddler finds at incredible prices!

Reining Unrealistic Holiday Visions as an ENFP

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We hosted our annual North Pole Party this past weekend, our kids’ holiday celebration that began eight years ago with seven little girls sitting at a table under a canopy of twinkle lights on our lanai and has expanded to fit what life looks like now — more kids, looser expectations and more experience with how to take the reins of my ENFP personality and steer it responsibly. As my personality test result explanation puts it, “Campaigners can be easily tripped up in areas where their idealism and passion are more of a liability than an asset.” I read this as: “Christmas gonna trip you up real good, honey.” I can’t help it that I’ve already selected three songs that will play during the movie montage playback of memories in my brain for holiday events before they’ve even happened. It’s just how I’m wired. I will explain how this can be a major problem in a moment here, but let’s dive into some of the party delights that make me so happy every year.

The sight of colorful Christmas cookies on a plate immediately initiates a little surge of dopamine in my brain. It’s such a happy site and combines three of life’s most wonderful things for a Joy Trifecta: colors, Christmas and sugar.

I balanced all the homemade baking with a stealthy slip-in of a boxed chocolate cookie mix that I disguised with a cute name plate and some powdered sugar dusting, but the kids were on to me. I’m sorry to report that Dancer’s Cocoa Crinkles had NO TAKERS. Not a one. I have spoiled them so much over the years that the little elves are well trained in detecting a lack homemade attempts. Or perhaps it’s because they look like cow piles and were sitting next to cups of milk I titled “Reindeer Milk”–a poor choice because nobody wants to drink that.

But the cocoa bar?

It was the hip corner of the house. They all wanted cocoa, they all drank corner, they all got a kick out of the fact that they could pour their own and doctor it up with 500 mini marshmallows and peppermint sticks and no one would stop them; and they all came back for more more more.

We made cocoa and refilled the tanks all night. I’m thinking about opening a hip bar with cocoa on tap.

Our craft this year was winter birdhouse ornaments–an easy one to set up for the kids to attempt mostly on their own (with a little supervision for the glue gun).

Do kids Lainey’s age still enjoy all of this? Yes, yes, and yes. I’m always prepared to shift things up to keep activities age appropriate, but since we keep the party focused simply on being together for a fun night, everyone’s all in.

I especially love watching the bigs with the littles. Nella was once the littlest one at the party, and look at her now–mothering the babies.

And about those lofty ENFP holiday dreams? Entertaining for the holidays is one of the best practices in recognizing the weaknesses of my emotional tendencies, but I have learned so much to help me remember what my expectations should really be. It’s similar to separating wants from needs. Do I want everyone to be smiling and laughing in an immaculate house with Christmas carols playing at the perfect volume and twinkle lights twinkling and a spread of beautiful looking homemade food that includes everyone’s favorites while children on their best behavior nestle into grandparents’ arms to hear stories that make us laugh at all the right parts, and everyone leaves proclaiming, “That was the best night ever!” I mean, yeah. But that’s not my expectation.

Here are a few of my holiday expectations for this month if you’d like to borrow them.

Expect that you will work hard to make everything perfect, but they might not notice everything you did. It’s okay. They notice subconsciously, and all these special things you do collectively gather to form the deepest, truest “I love you” that they will return to long after they’ve left the house. Do the special things only if they make you happy. If they stress you out, stop doing them. Choosing not to do them to be more present will also send the deepest, truest “I love you” that they will return to long after they’ve left the house.

Expect that things will go wrong as they always do. Cookies will burn. Kids will trip and get forehead shiners five minutes before the family photo. The most unique gift you found for your mother-in-law will also be given to her by your sister-in-law five minutes before she goes to open yours. It will rain instead of snow. The tree will dry up the day before Christmas Eve–not to mention, the lights will stop working Christmas morning. Your favorite cousin that you’re so excited is coming to your Christmas dinner will text that morning saying she can’t come. You’ll drop the Christmas breakfast casserole as you’re sliding it in the oven. You’ll forget where you hid the gift you’re most excited to give. Your kids will be dicks in front of the relatives you most want to impress.  And then discover the Santa wrapping paper in your closet.

So widen your expectations to include inevitable disappointment and instead set your starry-eyed heart toward this: You can’t control anything else but your behavior and reactions. Pour your holiday expectations into your own attitude. Model humor and resilience. Nurture and Notice. Hug your guests. Refill their glasses. Ask them questions. Serve with love. Put your phone down. Listen to the music. Taste the food. Initiate a game. Hold babies in your lap. Set the tone. Step back into childhood for a moment. Play. Watch a movie. Make note of all the things that make you feel grateful for right now. Be patient with the kids–they’re overstimulated and so excited about all of the fun that sometimes the excess has to bubble over in the form of meltdowns. Take a moment for yourself. Sneak off to your bedroom with a holiday cocktail and read a magazine for ten minutes if you need to decompress. Relax. Relax. Relax.

We head to Chicago this weekend for a weekend of winter wonderland. I don’t think snow is in the forecast, and that’s okay. And last year, we went straight from the airport to my friend’s house to pick up the key to the apartment she so generously lets us use, and Nella projectile puked all over her beautiful living room. So yeah, I have the roll-with-it thing down. Do you know what else ENFPs are good at? We know how to have fun–even in the midst of disappointing circumstances.

Happy Hump Day!