words fail me right now.

…and all i can say is thank you to some very special people in my life.

i could give you the long version, but i am certain i wouldn’t stop rambling. pages & pages.

so, the short version is this.

i met the closest thing to a sister without a blood test to prove it when i came to florida. (okay, so i’m blessed to have a few of those)

and i went on a journey with her for years as she tried to have a baby.

and while she was going through all of that, she held my hand while i pushed and breathed and brought my own into this world. and she cried happy tears for us the moment lainey was born.

one year, two in-vitros and many tears/cheers later, kelly & david had lily.

and i was there to see her born…and what a day that was.

i loved her from day one and despite ironing out a few logistics, taking care of her while her mommy went back to work was a no-brainer.

and they thank me every day…and send me letters and notes and give me praise so far above what i deserve. because watching lily & lainey is like watching my own two girls. it’s natural and it’s easy and it’s perfect.

but, tonight they went beyond.

i casually met them for dinner and after a few minutes of small talk and getting “the girls” happy and settled in our booth, the hostess walked over to our table carrying a large box and said, “this is for nanny k.”

i opened it.

and inside was a note, and it said…

(first a lot of praise i don’t even feel worthy to write on my own blog)…
but then this…
everyone says you should write a book…
now you can tell them you did.

and underneath were five hard-bound books. real books. and my pictures were on the covers…and they are titled enjoying the small things, volumes I, II, III, IV, and V.



they took my blog…every word i’ve ever written from day one to 365 days later (just a few days ago) when it celebrated its first birthday…
and all the accompanied photos…
and they had it printed. in color. and bound. hard bound with glossy covers.

and i cried. and i couldn’t find any words. and the waiter had to come back three times to take our order because i was too overwhelmed to think about food.

and i came home and could not stop touching them. reading them. inspecting them.

my books. my words. my pictures.

i feel so complete and loved and unworthy.

david, kelly & lily…i love you so.

…enjoying the friends-who-are-like-family things. ~k

…and if you’re in the naples area and didn’t get a chance to read the following post, please do…

my last card order was picked up today (now get those to the post office, leah!), and we are officially beginning christmas break (cheers!).

i think i designed fifteen cards in two weeks, but i could design cards all day. i will upload them all to the card gallery after the holidays.

again, i am so thankful for all my camera gear and software that allows me to do this, and i am excited to take this photography thing to new levels this next year.

here are a few unposted favorites from the holiday madness…

(oh, how i love this next one…)

…and can’t leave out the winners of the many holiday photo attempts of my own…

to all the families i’ve photographed this season, thank you for the opportunity. i have made wonderful friends.

and finally, in being blessed in our lives and hearing so much sadness around us, i’d like to give back.

in this economy, i know you may know someone…a single mom working more than one job struggling to make ends meet, a family who’s experienced a tragedy, a parent who volunteers selflessly despite their own hardships. you may know someone who can’t afford photography but who would cherish the gift this season. you know someone who deserves a reminder of what is most important…their kids & their family.

please e-mail me and nominate someone in the naples area. i will choose the winner (with a little objective help from family) and gift them with a free photo session and a print package. please nominate before december 22.

e-mail me your story at: kascryder@yahoo.com

oh, that feels so good.

…enjoying the giving things. ~k

i wanna dance. i wanna dance tonight. i wanna put on sequins and high heels and hail to christmas and the new year and thirty and love and babies and friends and all that is good. and i wanna do it tonight. but i have shrimp chowder up to my elbows, i’m wearing brett’s old stained gator championship t-shirt, and there’s no one to dance with. so, i guess i’ll have to do the next best thing.

all hail to the small things i love today.

10. i curled her hair today. i’ve never done it, and i don’t know what became of me, but i saw an old tiny barrelled curling iron in the bottom drawer of my bathroom cabinets (mind you, half-covered in old toothpaste and hairy ponytail holders) and i thought, “hey…i bet…”. and it worked. i hereby promise not to curl her hair too much lest i ruin it. but it’s pretty cute…i have to admit.

9. her little fight for kisses tonight. brett was holding her after he got home from work, and i kissed him…after which, we looked down to see her, in his arms, puckered up. she didn’t want to be left out. she replayed the whole thing for a video. check it out here: (embed is poopily not working again)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NghxrFaz1fY

8. the giant pot of shrimp chowder i made tonight. it’s this sinfully fantasic blend of cream and shrimp and crab and corn, gazillions of green onions and curly parsley…and three different kinds of cheeses. (props to sister on that one)

…lainey took a late, late nap, so i had the kitchen to myself…made a nice mess of it while i drank a beer, watched top chef, stirred, chopped, tasted…oh, i love to cook.

7. the girls are home.

after a week of being away from them….the boys’ mom is always so nice to watch them, but i missed them terribly this time. upon their return, i put their bed by the christmas tree so they lie all cute under the lights. and sophie, in the heavenly glow of christmas lights, actually looks like a purebread.

and lainey was so excited to have latte back, she crammed her in a stuffed puppy carrying case she got from uncle bubby and aunt dahna, and that was that (or, i didn’t know how to finish this sentence and “that was that” sounded cliche and capable enough to do the job).

6. her “scrunchy face.” if you ask her to make it, this is what she does…

…and it melts me to my knees and gives me fun little butterflies in my tummy. like i-cannot-believe-this-child-once-lived-inside-me kind.

…and then after the “scrunchy” when you think you couldn’t possibly think she’s any cuter, she throws ya this one:

why, hello there, unearthly happiness.

5. christmas cards. you don’t even know what 12:45 p.m. means. it means i’m pulling the blinds back and watching as our red mail jeep drives away. it means i scream “MAIL!!!!!” across the house and lainey slides her cowboy boots on and clomps as fast as she can to the door, smiling, to meet me. it means i say “are ya ready?” and she answers with a crazy grin. and we run together (sometimes with lily glued to my hip, smiling…sometimes with her sleepin’ inside) to the dented metal box and pull out a hopeful pile. and we leaf through until our heart stops at the sight of colored envelopes. hand-writing. address labels with holly and candycanes and little snowmen.

i love snail mail. i love it so much i re-read it. and pictures included? oh, died-and-gone-to-heaven. seriously. when i was in college, my cousin and i would send collages to each other…big spreads of paper with magazine pictures glued to it and top ten lists and quotes and love notes and, i swear, that is the sole reason i didn’t go crazy living in the middle of nowhere going to a christian liberal arts college…okay, that and the fact that i lived with my blessed grandparents and will never forget how wonderful that was…especially since they’re not here anymore.

but, back to christmas cards…i love them. i eat them, in fact. well, not so much eat them as tape them to my wall and look at the pictures until february. and my friends and i have a “contest” of who has the best card wall. and i cheat and put dumb cards from my dentist and dog groomer that say “happy holidays from the staff” to make my wall look cooler…unless i get enough pictures from “real” people to make it honorable. it’s the eighteenth, and we’re a little meager, folks. step it up.

4. the feeling that i’m a kid again. because i can’t wait ’til december 25. and i’ve been stashing 5’s and 10’s from photography jobs for months (with the help of poppa rik & gary’s christmas present) to buy her what i’ve been dreaming of forever:

i have been looking at this kitchen since before we were married. and it’s in boxes in the garage, and i refuse to open them until after she goes to sleep christmas eve…

…and i seriously feel like santa is coming. i can’t wait to stay up late with my mom, christmas music playing, and we will stock the fridge with play food and set her little table with her teaset. and i know i will cry when she sees it christmas morning and runs to play with it.

thank you, dad.

3. my new vice. my sister just gave it to me, and it needs a commercial. cliniques’ secret product. men’s bronzer. forget the “men” label…it’s sheer, it’s washable, it’s natural, and it makes you look like you just got back from st. tropez. props to sister again.

2. hats. coming home from michigan, i can’t stop. can’t give it up. and lest i be caught in palm tree paradise wearing a ski-cap, i’ve settled for this little tweed newsboy. and it stays on all day.

1. if you haven’t read this book, check it out today. it’s moving me incredibly.

my sister told me to read it a year ago (holy sister props!), and i waited for the hype to die down…or the urge to read to come back. being that i bought it on a front “best-seller” rack in an airport bookstore, i’d hardly say it’s died down.
however…it’s beautiful and moving and is shaking up all these inner parts of me…on spirituality, on pleasure, on love, on life…she is an amazing writer, and trust me…it is a beautiful read. i’m happy to pass it on when i’m done. (if you promise to read it properly…and that means in a bathtub of suds with a glass of wine and a plate of pears and bleu cheese, please)

…and “that’s that.”

oh, and speaking of sister…her cute post of us overtaking a coffee shop here.

tomorrow is friday, the eve of brett’s vacation. he saved his time this year for christmas…to just be home with us, watch movies, bake and do family stuff. i’m so happy.

…enjoying the small things. ~k