We went out tonight for Brett’s birthday–the whole family, all dressed up–to a restaurant other than Chili’s. Being that this hasn’t happened in a while and it was my husband’s birthday, I decided it was a special enough occasion to wear the Bump It. Bump It as in that As-Seen-on-TV hair accessory that pushes your hair up all sexy-like. You know, higher to heaven, closer to God. Okay, so maybe close to God doesn’t really go with sexy-like. Whatever. Anyway, I managed to position the plastic bridge underneath the top layer of my hair after four tries, clip it in place with a tight barrette and straighten it out enough in the mirror for some pretty good satisfaction. I thought it looked awesome. That is until I walked out to tell Brett I was ready.
He was laughing before I even made eye contact.
“What?” I asked. “It’s the hair, isn’t it?”
“Oh my God, you look like you have a speed bump on your head.”
“It’s not a speed bump. It’s a Bump It,” I offendedly snapped back, as if he was supposed to know what a Bump It was.
He smiled and said, “Cute.” And by “cute,” I know he meant “not cute.”
But I wore it anyway. I pretended my head didn’t itch all night and totally played off both times my sky hair caught the door frame of the car as I was climbing in, shifting my Bump It off-center so that it looked like a hairy fascinator. When I took Lainey to the bathroom mid-dinner, my reflection actually startled me.
Will I wear the Bump It again? Probably. Because, out of fifteen weird speed bump angles, there’s still this one straight-on one that looks so cool. Plus, I’m a hair gimmick girl. I mean, I still own a banana clip.
Sorry there aren’t any pictures tonight. I’m a picture girl–always will be. But my camera battery went dead and the charger’s still in my backpack–unpacked since Michigan.
We’re a little behind. But catching up this week.
*****
Okay, Popina swimsuit winners and their summer bucket lists:
Comment #1208, Lisa Marie:
Bucket list:
– climb a mountain here in Salt Lake City (I recently acquired a very fit and muscley boyfriend who has agreed to sling me across his shoulders and lug me up the steeper stretches. We call this love.)
– write at least one short story that I am not embarrassed by and could potentially send to friends for editing/input/revisions.
– finish a Sizeable Chunk of my PhD research.
– find a secluded hot spring and go skinny dipping at midnight.
– make crowns out of flowers for the kids I baby sit (a Swedish midsummer tradition- my country of origin!)
– write a few postcards to friends I haven’t seen in a while.
– get a deep deep tan that lasts through August.
– attend a Shakespeare theatre summer festival.
– bake something I’ve never baked before.
– compose messages for strangers with rocks on the salt flats.
– go on a road trip with windows down and terrible wonderful music blaring.
– pray more, and more often, because summer is for divine habits and upward
Comment #634, Beth Bruce:
Bucket List:
1. Backyard Camping
2. Pick tomatoes fresh off the plants and pop directly into mouth.
3. Run through the sprinklers.
4. Roast marshmallows over the grill.
5. Drink beers on the patio with my husband after the babies are in bed.
and
Comment #195, The Book Sylph
Bucket List:
1.) strawberry picking
2.) baking strawberry crisps
3.) some cottage time
4.) backyard sprinkler fun for my 2 year old
5.) fireworks
6.) cuddling with a toddler who smells like sunscreen
7.) prepping for baby #2 who will greet us when the Fall arrives
Congratulations, winners! To claim your suit, please e-mail kellehamptonblog@comcast.net your contact info with the subject line POPINA GIVEAWAY WINNER. Thank you!
And for those of you who didn’t win who still would love a Popina swimsuit, our friends at Popina were so kind to set up a discount code for you. Receive a generous 20% off your Popina order using the code “summerbucketlist.”
You know what Popina suits look good with? Bump It hair. Just sayin’.
*****
Finally, if you haven’t heard of the wonderful organization called Sevenly, please check them out this week. They bring you cool products and donate a generous portion of their product proceeds ($7 of every purchase!) to different organizations each week. This week, they are donating to Lettercase, an organization that distributes books and resources to expectant parents with a new Down syndrome diagnosis–books that provide accurate, up to date information and authentic photos of people with Down syndrome in ballet class, at school, at work, etc. By shopping at Sevenly this week, you’re helping provide a lifeline to moms and dads who need hope.
Have a wonderful weekend, friends.
Tiffany says
Oh my… Bump It huh? I am lucky if my hair is ever out of a high pony tail.
Maria says
Ok..really need pictures of Lainey’s gifts to Brett. Always a much anticipated post. Happy B’day, Brett.
Martha Baur says
Look at my Godson, Neddie! I love this kid! He’s five years old and has Down Syndrome. He rocks the Cup Song! You’ll love it! I promise! http://youtu.be/ChWNLgMAzw4
Patti says
this post just begs a picture, kelle. inquiring minds want to know what you looked like sporting the bump it !!
Ali says
Sometimes leaving the photos out makes us hear your words more strongly. And this was a particularly funny set of words!
Thanks for the morning laugh,
From Switzerland,
Ali
Phyl says
Laughed out loud. Wish your battery had been charged! Phyl
Chiara says
I saw the picture on Instagram and I can tell that your hair looked really nice!! Maybe you just need some more practice, but don’t give up! π
Lady Blogger says
If you want the “bump it” look, good volumizing hairspray and a round brush give that natural look, without the plastic hairpiece. Just a suggest! I tried to be a “bump-it” girl, until I discovered different styling techniques. Good luck! π
Alicia says
I agree! This post begs a picture. It’s hard for me to do new things because my husband would look at me and give me the not-cute “cute” too, lol… But I’m all about doing things he doesn’t always like just because I have to try them out for myself π
Alicia D says
Wait a sec… WHERE is the picture of you with the Bump It?!?! C’monnnnnn π LOL! You crack me up!
Jenn @ Bliss to Bean says
Haha I LOVE all of your posts and this one sounds like me! I have tried those things and speed bump is the correct word!! I think they’re up there with false eyelashes; I can never figure out those tricky things either. Hope your husband had a wonderful birthday!! π
Maeghan says
I bought 2 Bump Its (promotion and I thought someone else would want one, I was wrong ) and I have never worn it out. I’m never happy with the way it looks, even when my stylist tried it out, and my husband just laughs. You’ve made me feel weak when you still rocked the Bump It π
Cassadie says
Well, since I added “win a new swimsuit” to my bucket list and then didn’t, I guess I’ll just have to order one!
So thanks for the excuse to do some shopping this morning.
PS: banana clip- ha! I had forgotten all about those.
Michelle Thiele says
I loved reading this! So fun to start my weekend with a smile. Happy birthday to Brett!
Lisa says
of all the posts to not include a picture???? I am dying to see the bump it in action.
Josie Skinner says
This comment has been removed by the author.
Josie S. says
I love Bump Its!! Ok, maybe they are slightly ridiculous, but so what! I still think they’re fabulous. So happy you rocked one for the occasion. Please post a picture!
Josie S. says
p.s. My husband teases me about my outfits all the time. It’s never stopped me!
Olivia {The more I see the less I know} says
You’re not alone, just this week I bought nude pumps for a wedding I’m in (all the bridesmaid did) and my husband said, “Those are the ugliest shoes ever.”
And he has no room to talk he wore a “Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That” t-shirt this week. HA!
I don’t don’t take fashion advice from him. lol
Ps. I braided my bangs for a wedding I photographed a few weeks ago and got a lot of flack for it too… apparently I looked soul than hippie.
lindley says
Yep, yep! I tweeted and fb’d about Sevenly the other day! Bought something too! So glad you posted about it! AND–of all times for the camera to be missing! We are all dying to see a pic of the Bump It in action!
Jerrmy Greenhouse says
omg. this bump it bit= awesome.
i had not heard of the bump it til just about 4 minutes ago, while reading this post. and,um, i’m just… tickled. tickled i tell you!! you’re a funny lady. π
*Jess* says
I think only southern belles can pull it off (since we are kinda weird here in SC) and I wouldn’t classify Florida as Southern. But I bet you wore it with style π
The Manrings says
i knew from the title of this post…hehehe…i do love a good bump it. i remember trying to position it in my hair one night on your couch when you were newly pregnant with Nella.
ps happy birthday B! =)
Lisa Brown says
No Bump It photos?! Gah… you’re breaking my heart! You should wear it on a regular day… if for no other reason than to take a photo to post. π
Kelly Cach says
I gave my bump it away as a gag gift….Hahahaha!!! It did NOT work for me.
And I can’t stop belly laughing at your description of hitting it on the car…hahahahahah. So me π
Mindy Thomas says
Oh Kelle….soooo funny. I bought the bump it from a grocery store bargain bin and was convinced it was the answer to my hair styling prayers…not to be. Thanks for sharing all of your life, the good, the bad and he hilarious. π
Renee' says
OH GOOD GRIEF: I laughed out loud so hard, my husband asked what was WRONG with me! You guessed it, I know exactly what you looked like and how you felt every time you hit your Bump It on the top of the car! My husband dare not say a word!!! Thanks for the laugh Kelle
Manda says
What?! No bump-it pictures? Seriously, that is simply unforgivable.
Oh, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRETT!
Liz says
Oh yes! We need that bump-it picture!!
Julie says
I tried a Bump It for a bridesmaid look – I was in my best friend’s wedding while 8 months pregnant and wanted something to distract from my whale-like appearance. My sister desperately tried to work her magic but all I got were some pretty good laughs from my parents and ended up ripping it out. So long, Bump It!
Jennifer Currier says
Oh no!! You are SO not allowed to regale us with stories of your Bump-It’s Night Out without a photo of it!!! Can you do a re-creation sometime this week?? I need a visual I can giggle about…
Raelyn says
Kelle….
At last, I have time to comment on Blogs, now that My Life Story is finished!! ;-D
Now, wait a second!! You are a natural-born photographer, and did not snap any pictures of your Bump It?! Liar, liar pants on fire!! I think that you simply did not wish for the entire world to see you wearing it!! Hee, hee, hee…. ;-D
–Raelyn
Lex Wisniewski says
I just have to say I find it VERY CONVENIENT that the battery died the night you bumped it … just sayin’. π
KellyDove says
Now this is funny. I think my favorite line is, “… my reflection actually startled me.”
Anne says
how can you NOT share a pic of the hair!?!
QB @ Tales from Domestic Obscurity says
I’m late to the party, but here’s my Bucket List :). http://www.dfpphotography.com/about-me/my-bucket-list-mansfield-ohio-dreamer/