With the beginning of a new school year, we’ve reestablished our systems to stay organized at home, as well as make sure we start the year equipped with everything the kids need. All kids, of course, need support for a successful school year; but for Nella, it’s even more important. Learning and keeping up with school procedures requires more accommodations and support, and we want to set her up for the greatest success this year. Independence is our ultimate goal for her, and we are always thinking of ways we not only can help her learn and achieve success academically but also manage life skills on her own including home routines, getting ready for school, communicating with others and understanding her schedule and what’s required of her. Fortunately, routine is her super power. She loves consistency and embraces tasks and responsibility. There are a few things we’ve found to be helpful in supporting Nella through the school year I thought I’d share–some special needs parenting “hacks,” if you will.
Hire a Tutor
Any extra help Nella receives to practice basic reading, writing and math skills is helpful; and it’s nice to have someone other than family helping her (she’s less likely to whine or ask to go do something else). This year, we hired one of Nella’s favorite high school students to tutor her after school. Nella loves going, and it’s a great way for our high school friend to make some extra money as well as expand her experience as she prepares for college. I put together a tutoring box with resources for them to work on together and reached out to Nella’s teachers to send home any classwork that needed reinforcement.
What’s in our tutoring box?
– Handwriting Without Tears workbook
– Bob books
– Basic Addition & Subtraction workbooks
– Sight word Bingo
– Math manipulatives
– Handwriting white board and white board markers
– flash cards
– ideas for activities
– stickers, treasure box prizes to use as incentives for listening and working hard
The Target Dollar Spot also has some great inexpensive classroom and learning materials that make great tutoring box additions.
Glasses Hooks
I tell any parent of kids who wear glasses about these–they were life changers for us. We slide stay puts on Nella’s glasses to help her keep them from sliding down. Kids with Down syndrome don’t have the same nasal bone structure as other kids which can make keeping glasses on challenging. Stay puts are silicone soft hooks that slide over the bows of the glasses and hook over your child’s ears–keeps them secure on their face and prevents them from sliding down their nose.
Calendar Display with Related Arts Schedule
We are always working towards independence with Nella which includes basic school routines and not relying on us to know where she’s going every day or how she should be prepared. One of the great things about traveling with my friend Liz for Ruby’s Rainbow is getting to see up close what life is like for adults with Down syndrome who are going to college. We’ve tagged along so many different college students, giving us the opportunity to take a closer look at how they are succeeding–don’t think I haven’t taken notes on what we can start doing at home now! Visual displays, calendars, charts–these are all imperative for anyone’s success, but especially for people with Down syndrome. We keep a school calendar display, including a chart of Nella’s related arts schedule, in the central area of our home. Every morning, she asks “What do I have today?” so she knows how to dress, and we never answer for her. We take her to the calendar and make her figure it out. She loves this part of her morning routine now, and has figured out on her own how to find the day of the week, moving her little finger over until she finds the corresponding related arts. “Oh, I have music.”
Backpack Center
We laugh that Nella is the most responsible one in our home and that we all rely on her to keep us organized. She loves consistency and knowing where to put things. Last year, we had no “system” for backpacks, so the kids would drop them wherever they fell which made us scramble later when we were pulling homework folders out or looking for the dirty lunchbox to wash. Finally, at the end of the year, I couldn’t take it. We don’t really have a mudroom space, but we did have a laundry room closet we were using to store winter coats (that we only wear when we travel north in the winter) and old Halloween costumes–a total waste of a much needed closet. I removed the door, painted the closet, added a plank of wood with hooks and some basic storage shelving (temporary), and now we have a designated place for backpacks, lunch boxes and water bottles. This has been so great for Nella–she makes sure everyone hangs their backpacks and puts their lunch boxes away, and she heads right to the backpack cubby in the morning to pull everything we need to get ready.
Educating the Classroom about Special Needs
At the beginning of every school year, we ask that Nella’s class be educated about Down syndrome. Knowledge is power, and if we aren’t talking about obvious differences kids notice, they’ll make their own assumptions or think that disability is something to be ashamed of. Inviting the kids to ask questions and giving them specific tools they can use to communicate with and support Nella has created the most beautiful community of friends and cheerleaders for her. We give the staff this script to use as a guide and invite them to make it their own. This list of children’s books about specific disabilities and differences is also helpful when talking to classes.
Next on our list? Helping Nella learn how to tie her own shoes! (any tips?)
Ruth says
Have you tried the 2 loop (bunny ears) method? You know like when you’re going to double knot the laces? I never could master the single loop wrap around finger way and have always tied shoes with 2 loops. ?
mbmom11 says
There is a book called “Red Lace, Yellow Lace” that has worked for some of my kids. I found it at a library years ago and two of my older kids learned from it quickly. I just ordered it anew from Amazon for my 9year old who couldn’t really tie his shoes well. I’ll be making the 11 year old who can’t tie learn as well. Then my 6 year old daughter with DS will give it a shot. (We have other concerns right now with her.) The different color laces make it so much easier to see the hole to slip the bow into, and to distinguish what your fingers are holding.
(I’m big into Velcro shoes- kids can do things independently!- so I never pushed these two much to do shoe tying. However, it’s a life skill so I’m trying now.)
Michelle says
When it comes to tying shoes my friend had the best advice? She paid for a “class” at Macy’s! No way she was going to even enter that battle zone. That was over ten years ago, but might be worth checking with shoe stores near you, or even pay one of her peers to help.
Emily Hair says
This looks easy ?
https://youtu.be/5b0PiWo5rC4
Bev Dyck says
This is the best way to teach it! I can teach any child to tie their laces this way! I use it all the time with my students with special needs.
Cindy says
My daughter- age 14 DS (in High School) learned how to tie her own shoes at one point, but now we just buy her slip on laces because stopping to tie would really just slow her down. In hindsight, I regret all the time we spent on that skill and other physical skills where there are really easy and socially acceptable adaptations vs. working on other really important to her life skills like social and conversational skills.
Liz says
Have a friend teach her, maybe even one of Lainey’s friends. We couldn’t for the life of us teach our son how to tie his shoes and one day he came home from school saying that “xxxx” taught him!
Amy Smith says
my kids used an old shoe box:- I got thicker cords in two different colors. Made holes and laced up the cords on the box. this is more manageable because kids can put it on their lap or a desk or a table to practice instead of hunched over their knee. Having the two laces in different colors helps.
Amy Walter says
Slip ons…no just kidding. I had issues with small motor skills and we had moved in the middle of kindergarten. There were lots of tears, but my mom asked a neighbor to help teach me and we used the 2 loop method…at least when I tie my shoes. At 47 I wear a lot of slip ons: Birkenstocks, bike sneakers, flip flops, clogs and no I don’t have problems anymore. Keep trying, she is going to figure it out.
Amy Walter says
Part 2:
When my daughter was in kindergarten or first grade they had this and she loved it. It made it a game and took the pressure off. Her words not mine. lol
https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-1667365/melissa-doug-lacing-shoe.jsp?skuid=90539250&ci_mcc=ci&utm_campaign=PRESCHOOL%20TOYS&utm_medium=CSE&utm_source=google&utm_product=90539250&CID=shopping15&utm_campaignid=196835972&pid=googleadwords_int&af_channel=CSE&gclid=Cj0KCQjwqs3rBRCdARIsADe1pfRQmh0bl_928r76OYzdh23dehXiRy2ojbCWpepACKYDb4kU21_XTNYaArLlEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds
Ali says
Shoe tying is such a complicated task! The combination of motor planning and fine motor skills makes it really tough for some kids. I agree with the other commenter suggesting slip on or elastic laces! Independence is the key here and sometimes that means adapting the task 🙂
Nanci Guartofierro says
Maybe this will help for tying shoes?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gm5ItoIJ4sg
Jodi Meerbeek says
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/p/tie-your-shoes-rocket-style-tie-your-shoes-bunny-style
This book has worked well for our kids and it teaches both ways.
Jeannine says
“Knowledge is power, and if we aren’t talking about obvious differences kids notice, they’ll make their own assumptions or think that disability is something to be ashamed of.” Yes! I was just discussing this with a friend in another context. We need to talk – and keep talking – with our kids about difference: disability, race, sexual orientation, gender identity, religion… Let them ask questions; give them the right information and vocabulary. Everyone benefits.
Linda says
Best advice I was ever given:
Hire an advocate-a special education advocate can help insure that your child is being offered all the services that they need and that their IEP has effective and properly written goals. They can also perform program observations (or get you in touch with a SPED curriculum specialist) to be sure that your school is setting your child up for success. As our kids get older inclusion in the regular ed classroom is more difficult to implement. Modifying curriculum is not easy and that is where a SPED curriculum specialist/advocate can help.
AT Evaluation- ask your district for an assistive technology evaluation. They pay for this. The AT specialist will make recommendations for apps and other technology that will make it easier for your child to access curriculum. Why have a low tone child struggle with handwriting when we have speech to text apps and apps that allow worksheets to become live documents.
Social Emotional Learning-make sure that your district has staff trained in Social Emotional Learning programs like Socialthinking and get your child in a weekly lunch bunch at school to work on social and conversation skills.
Lunch bunch is included on my child’s IEP