When I was pregnant with Lainey and started thinking about buying baby gear, I wasn’t particular about a lot of things except when it came to a baby book. I wanted a really nice baby book. Always a bit of a documentarian, I cared a lot about the structure of where I’d store milestones and memories. And if the baby book is the last thing you thought about when you were pregnant, I totally get it. Most people laugh about the fact that the first three pages of their kid’s baby book are filled with details and photos and all the things, and then crickets for the rest of the book. I think a lot of “failed baby books” are due to standards we set that are way too high as well as poorly structured baby books prompting you to tediously record details of things you’re not going to care to recall someday. You don’t need to remember what date your kid’s lateral incisor came in, Gina. And by Gina, I mean me because look what I wasted time writing when Lainey was a baby. A diagram and everything!
After having Nella and understanding the beauty of “Delayed milestones don’t really matter!”, I have a whole new perspective on questions like “When did Baby roll over?” or “When did Baby sit up on her own?” These kinds of questions also make it likely for you to fizzle out on documentation. If you miss recording a couple months of these, it’s hard to go back and write them down later and easy to close the book and quit recording for good.
So what are things that are important to write down? What are you going to wish you recorded? I’m not an expert on baby books, but I have really enjoyed keeping them for each of my kids and can at least tell you from experience how I eventually tapered things down to preserve really special things I know my kids will be happy to read someday. When I say “tapered down,” I mean I figured out by the third kid that not everything is worth saving. See Figure A:
But first, let’s start with the basics: How do you choose a baby book? What should you buy?
Tip #1: Splurge on the Baby Book
If you are at all into the whole documentation thing (and no worries if you’re not–skip it, your kid will be fine!), splurge on a baby book. Strollers and car seats and cribs cost a pretty penny these days, and yet you’ll only use them for a few years. A baby book? It’s the one baby item you’ll actually use and save forever. Spend the money to buy one you’ll love and be motivated to use.
Tip #2: Buy a Baby Book with Loose Leaf Pages
I highly recommend 3-ring binder style baby books with loose leaf pages. It gives you a lot of control over the book and allows you to add your own pages and slip in things the book prompts may have left out. I have added so many of my own pages and clear pocket sleeves that make great places to store all the overlooked things that are fun to save–things like hospital badges from visitors who came to see the baby.
My kids’ baby books are made by Marcela, and I love them. I bought them from a local boutique where I was able to customize the insert pages (I had the pages from another book taken out and swapped with the cover I wanted–more likely allowed at a local boutique where they’ll work with you). Another great loose-leaf baby book is Artifact Uprising’s The Story of You – clean, simple and beautifully laid out. C.R. Gibson offers a more inexpensive loose-leaf option.
Tip #3: It Doesn’t Have to be Perfect!
Say it with me, perfectionists: You can keep writing in your kid’s baby book even if your hand slipped and that H looks like an A. You can keep writing in your kid’s baby book even if you started with a blue pen and now all you have is a black pen. Make mistakes and write a little bit messy right away so you set the tone for easy, soulful documentation and not perfection. See look! Mine’s sloppy and carefree! But there’s gold in these scribbles and crooked envelopes slapped on with whatever tape I could find.
Tip #4: Use Envelopes
When you use a 3-ring binder type of baby book, you can slip in blank pages. A lot of these blank pages in my books have envelopes taped to them. This is a great way to store the family Christmas card, birthday invitations, folded pictures they drew, hair they cut out themselves, photos, ultrasound pics, etc. I tape a lot of photos down in my books as well, but the envelopes are great for storing multiples of photos as well as cards.
Tip #5: Create a Baby Book Writing Ritual
The best way to not fizzle out on keeping a baby book is to make it fun. If it feels like a chore, forget about it. The only reason my kids’ baby books are filled is because I loved the ritual of doing it. For their first year of life, I worked on their books once a month (in between, I’d jot things down on paper and just shove it in the book to store it until I dedicated the time to write it in the book). I’d make sure any photos I wanted to include were printed ahead of time and then I’d gather the book, the notes I had scribbled, a couple good pens, some tape and a glass of wine; and I’d put a movie on and enjoy the process of catching up on the book. After the first year, I worked on the books more infrequently; but to this day, I still shove scraps of scribbled notes in each of their books until one night when I’m feeling nostalgic and return to put it all in its proper place.
Tip #6: Record the Things You Would Have Loved to Have Known About Yourself When You Were Little and the Things You Would Have Loved to Have Known About Your Mom’s First Year of Motherhood
The big question is–what to record. If you’re going to make the space to write down things about your baby’s life, let them be important things. First of all, the first year of a baby’s life isn’t that much unlike the first year of any other baby’s life. We all think our own babies are so special and full of unique personality, but there’s not that many things you can say about babies that don’t apply to all babies. I actually have a paragraph in Lainey’s baby book under “Month 1” dedicated to her amazingly unique personality trait of “likes to eat.” Um, every baby likes to eat. She wasn’t a shining star. A more interesting and unique approach to recording the first month would be to record Mom’s new take on motherhood. Looking back on my own baby book, I give ZERO effs about the fact that I woke up at 2:00, 4:00, and 6:00 (who am I kidding–it was 1978, and I’m the last baby–I didn’t even have a baby book). But I would have loved to have known what overwhelming postpartum moments made my mom cry or what the first song she sang me to sleep was.
So here’s the things I’ve recorded in my kids’ books that I’m so glad I have written down. I don’t consider any of them milestones. I consider them little love stories.
Favorite Toys and Toy Stages – The kids love hearing about these, and they will be fun to come back to someday at the Thanksgiving dinner table when they’re all in their twenties. “What was that toy Lainey was so into in second grade? Mom, go get the baby book! Oh my God, Squinkies! That’s right! I forgot all about those!” Even better, save those most loved toys. I have a little box with all of the small toys my kids were once obsessed with. One rubber band loom bracelet Lainey made, three Squinkies, a handful of Shopkins, the green bean rattle Dash loved as a baby, a squishy laced with strawberry-scented chemicals and Nella’s original Barbie, Poop I.
Places We Visited and Loved – At the end of each month’s page in my kids’ books, there’s a prompt that says “Places We Visited.” I didn’t realize how special this prompt was until I recently looked back at some of the early years and noticed how many special outings I would have completely had forgotten about. It’s also a great way to prove to yourself how much you really do get out when it doesn’t feel that way sometimes. Our lists include things like “Third Street Farmer’s Market, Vanderbilt Library, Brunch at First Watch with Mommy’s friends, Captiva Island day trip with the family.”
Unique Favorites or Dislikes- Funny little quirks are always fun to remember. Think beyond my genius “likes to eat” documentation and get specific. You love when we rub the little space above your nose between your eyes, and it always makes you fall asleep. You love my yellow earrings with the dangly beads and always try and rip them off when I wear them which is why we’ve put them away for a while. You love the Elmo pop-up book and have ripped his eyes off three times, and we keep taping them back on.
Stories Behind Firsts – The dates on firsts don’t really matter, but you’ll want to remember the story behind them. Where were you when they took their first steps? How did you react? How did Dad react? I don’t know when Lainey lost her first tooth, but I definitely remember we were at the fair, and it fell into a pile of teeth-looking white shell bits. I remember her crying that we wouldn’t be able to find it (we never did) and then convincing her that we’d sell the tooth fairy on a piece of broken shell that looked like a tooth. Record the stories. You will think you will remember them, but unless you write it down, you’re going to forget more than half.
People in Their Lives – Who came to their birthday parties, who their favorite friend in preschool was, which neighbor they always want to stop and talk to on family walks. People come in and out of our lives. I love looking back at my kids special moments in life and remembering who played a role, who showed up, who made an impact.
Letters – If you fill out nothing else in the baby book, write them letters. Tell them what you are learning, how much you love them, what you worry about, how special they are.
Funny Things They Say and Mispronunciations – This one might be my favorite thing to remember and what our whole family loves to talk about the most…the funny things our kids said, invented phrases they coined, mispronunciations, imaginary friends (Lainey had one named Sankalinka), what they named their fish. You’ll forget if you don’t write them down. Dash could have a three-volume book on these alone. I posted something on Instagram a couple months ago asking what favorite mispronunciations your kids have, and I swear I’ve never had so many comments on one post. We love this stuff. We want to remember it. Just yesterday, I wrote down 2 things Dash says right now that I know I’ll forget if I don’t write it down. “Pizuzz” for “Because.” “Yoom” for “Room”
And if all this feels overwhelming? Skip the baby book and buy a beautiful memory box. Scribble whatever you want on scraps of paper, date them and throw them in the box. No rules.
Is there anything you’re glad you recorded for your kids that I didn’t include? Do you wish you would have written down more? Less? Kept a baby book in a different way? Do tell.
*I edited the photos in this post on an old computer that desperately needs its screen recalibrated, so apologies for the off colors.
Becky says
I recorded my oldest son’s first lie: I asked him who ripped one of his book and he blamed it on the Easter Bunny.
I always wanted to make a For Realz baby book: first major diaper blowout, worst tantrum in public, grossest thing u ever ate, etc
Kelle says
This is BRILLIANT. This is the stuff we laugh about years later.
Charlene says
I think my favorite things that I have recorded for my 3 daughters are their first 100ish words and phrases. It’s so fun to be able to “remember” what they said and how they pronounced it. Beer even made it in the first 100 for one!
Chelsea says
My parents were never good with written documentation, but my dad was a camcorder maniac. Up until cell phones with quality video and photo taking abilities existed, my dad’s right eye was permanently pressed into that tiny little square hole of the Sony camcorder, following all five of his girls everywhere. His eye may have actually been glued there, not sure. He always made a point to record special events like birthdays and recitals and holidays, but our favorite ones to watch now that we’re all in our 20s and 30s are the regular, mundane Wednesdays. It’s fun to look back and see the games we played, our favorite dolls, preferred pajamas, way we got ready for dinner and then bed, etc. It’s the little details that we tend to forget over time, but ours are preserved. I’m beyond grateful for the hours of Easter egg dyeing footage the Saturday night before, the dances my little sister and I made up in the backyard, the way we used to ride our poor black lab, Maddie. No one will ever forget the evening the baby of the family received a bra on her 10th birthday in front of the 15 people there celebrating her, but we probably would have forgotten the way we all took turns practicing secret handshakes with her long after company had gone home, Dad recording us from around the corner and out of sight. Fortunately, both are permanently saved on a tiny cassette tape in a cabinet in the living room, and the latter are actually the kinds of videos my sisters and I dig up together from time to time, excited to relive the moments that have long since passed. As it turns out, the small details are our foundation, strong and unwavering. My parents taught me a lot of things, but this is the lesson I hold closest to my heart, and I can’t wait to teach my own babies one day, too. xo
Alex says
Chelsea … I literally cried reading this comment about your dad’s videos . My two little boys are growing so fast , I find myself clinging to every grain of sand that’s slipping through my fingers . My little guys are almost 1 and almost 3, and I am always taking pictures and videos of every cute moment . You have me a lot to think about when it comes to which moments are the ones to treasure .
Julie says
I often look at what my mom kept and my grandma’s kept – what had made it through the years, the things I delight in remembering or wish I had to share with my own kids for inspiration – for example: bring home outfits, made my daughter’s from the shirt her daddy wore on our first date. And when we are done having babies I am having sting made with their locks of hair. Also I take complete advantage of FB memories. My statuses are often quotes from the kids I want to remember and it’s the quickest (therefore most likely to happen) place for me to record it. I’ll go back and put in all in a boom with pictures, maybe even this year.
Janie says
Daily routines
What the world around them is like—house, neighborhood, town, country
Family lineage—small photos of people in the family tree. Use both a baby pic and a pic of the person grown. Write a short blurb about that person and their traits. It’s fun to see family resemblances.
Emily of The Three Bite Rule says
As a former scrapbooker, I felt bad not creating masterpieces. There’s still time I guess- mine are 4yrs old and a baby 7 months.I liked the format of my son’s so I got the exact same for my daughter knowing it’d be very do-able. I want to add more of my observations about them rather than monthly height & weight. Fav toys is such a fun one!
Rosanna says
I love this! We do exactly the same- quick grab a pen and write it down before you forget (because, oh my, you will!) and then I take an evening to fill everything in. My kids love their baby books more than anything else on the shelf because it’s a book all about them. My oldest son is from February 2013 just like Dash. He thinks the “what he says” quotes are so funny.
Jenn says
Where was this post 6 years ago?! I have one (and a calendar) and was so excited to write in it, but barely got anything written in either. I love the idea of just jotting something on paper and storing it in the book until you have time to sit and update it. Makes it a lot more manageable as opposed to sitting down 6 months later and trying to remember everything. Luckily I can look through my photos or FB/IG posts and get dates and some details from there, but still.
Overall, I’m nowhere close to the mom I thought I’d be, and I just hope she doesn’t feel neglected when she gets older and asks things about when she was a baby (like she already has started to) and resent me for not documenting it better 🙁 We’ll always have photos and memories.
I even created an email account and had plans to send her pictures and funny stories/memories and then give her the password when she’s 18 or so. But there it sits out there in the internet collecting spam and junk mail. I also started a notebook because I had a silly thought that I would write little letters to her there to make up for all the baby book notes I missed. …but I don’t even know where that is anymore.
I feel like such a failure and hope she never thinks I didn’t love her enough to document everything. 🙁
Linnae Bosma says
A few weeks ago I found a journal I started for my son. He’s now 31 and I wrote two pages!! Try to not be so hard on yourself — my two sons are adults now and we talk about memories from when they were kids and giggle. I have basic baby books for each of them but neither of them have ever looked at them (they are in their memory boxes which are in my basement). I don’t think Kelle was implying we all have to be the way she is (I’m certainly not) — just hang out and have a good time and do the best you can. And remember … your best and someone else’s best isn’t the same thing. Ever.
Amanda says
We just had our first baby and he is the first grandson for my parents. My mom pulled out my baby book and I can see how incredibly special is is to her. I think it’s fun to see but I can tell it is so precious to her to remember me as a baby and that time in her life.
I’ve been thinking about that quite a bit when I’m starting to think about what write down for our son’s book. I want to make sure we write moments that help my husband and I remember this really special and precious time in our lives but also a book that our son might find interesting and special in the future.
Thank you for this list, it was really helpful to get me started with some prompts to start writing! (and there are some really good ideas in the comments too!)
Joyce says
It’s not to late to write notes. I don’t know how old your daughter is but it’s not too late. But a new notebook if you can’t find the original. It will be a treasure. Give your girl some extra hugs and give yourself some grace. Parenting is hard.
Denise says
You are not a failure! We all do the best we can and we have to believe that’s good enough! Could you maybe just print out some Instagram photos to stick in the book? Pictures tell the best stories anyway. Your daughter will remember being loved and having fun with you. That’s what matters. I can tell from your post that you’ve got that well under control!
Rachel says
I love this post! You really should write one.
Jacci says
The notes and stories we wrote in our daughter’s baby books have come in handy as we now write stories to our grandson about his mom. What was her favorite book, her most yummy food, her first steps. As I enter my late 60’s, I’m glad to have spent time writing in the books…..and yes, the end of the book is full of crickets as they enter 3rd grade, 5th grade and life got so busy, but those early memories are safe….(I remember thinking as I rocked my first baby to sleep in those first days of her life, that I would remember every minute of our precious times….we know that didn’t happen, even tho they are so totally loved). As I look back thru their baby book, it brings other memories to the surface and it’s fun to tell our grandson what his mom was like and also what I was like as a baby, as a toddler, as a kid. Thanks to my mom and dad for collecting so many pictures and telling so many stories as well. Keeping your family history alive is so important. Be a story-teller!
Jennifer Reil says
My 7th child is now 14 months old. For all of my kiddos I took photos of them each month with a large stuffy and wrote a few notes of things I wanted to remember from that month. My first 3 kiddos have these photos scrapbooked in their albums. #4 has his photos done, but I still have to go back and do the journaling (he’s almost 10 now, yikes!). I feel like #5 is the most neglected, I took all of his photos, but I still haven’t printed them out yet :(. #s 6 & 7 have their monthly milestones recorded on my blog at least (although I will print their photos and scrapbook them as well). I keep telling myself to keep taking photos, and jotting down memories. The day will come when all of my kiddos will be in school, then I’ll finally be able to scrapbook them the way I want.
Alice says
I have 7 kids and nary a baby book in the bunch. Oops! But I now have 5 grandkids (soon to be 6!!!!) and I have purchased pretty leather 3-ring binders for each of them with each name embossed on the cover. I am writing letters to them about things I remember from each of their mom or dad’s childhood; family traditions from our family; and stories from my own childhood. I write about times that we spend together and tell them how much I love them. That’s all that counts, right?
Erin says
Love this! Definitely yes on the 3 ring binder! I made my baby book as a word document. I print one out on regular paper before baby is born so I can write sloppily all over it, then go back and print it on nice paper later and write neatly (plus if I missed a milestone, I just delete it from the document before I print it on the nice paper). I also use a plain calendar of their first year to write about random stuff no baby book would think to ask- first hike, that day trip to the dinosaur museum, first day at the beach. Then after the year is over, I print it on nice paper and write on it neatly and add stickers. I have a separate journal for letters to each kid. I have 5 kids so keeping up on it all isn’t easy, but it’s not impossible and I have a good system going. Each kid also has an art binder (I just three hole punch everything, write the date on it, and put it in the back. I don’t save everything- just the favorites). They each have a school binder, too, with 1-12 dividers. Again, I only save some stuff from each year.
Sara O'Leary says
This is lovely, Kelle. I think some publisher should be on it because you could write/design a baby book template that would be amazing.
I never kept them for my kids although I did write a sort of diary in letters for my firstborn. If I had kept baby books they would have been a lot of use to me when I sat down to write those milestone books about the first three years…I found I’d forgotten almost everything!
Mary B. says
I didn’t do a baby book for my first daughter, but kept a very short journal of the first year of her life. We’re talking five lines per day, max. My son? Hahahahaha, it hasn’t happened. Oh well. We do print our photos every month, so that they can actually be seen on something other than a phone or computer. I do keep mementos: the first sleeper, the first Christmas outfit, but I am very selective.
Jessica says
When my Mom died at the age of 93, my husband gave her memorial service, He started it by saying “Jeanne was the most amazing sweet and gentle and kind person, have you ever wondered what this lovely lady was like as a baby? Wouldn’t you love to ask her mother?” And he pulled out her baby book and began reading from it. The friends and family there loved it.
My Mom was a totally lovely and beautiful person, ever the lady, and wow did she love clothes and shoes. When my husband read the sweet things my Grandma wrote about her in that satin baby book it completely made her come alive as a little baby, when so many in the audience had known her as an older woman. And when he read that one of her first words was “shoe” and that when she first crawled it was toward her shoes, the crowd roared with laughter.
I’m a fifth kid, so I completely forgive my Mom that I don’t have a baby book, but were we ever happy my Grandma did such a good job on her first child’s book!
Karen says
I am very sentimental, probably to a fault. I have a paperboard 3 drawer doohickey I bought from Lillian Vernon years ago. Each drawer was for a certain grade in school. I kept the best of their schoolwork in those drawers which are now stored in the attic. I have both kids a keepsake box. Brandy’s has her cheer leading stuff, any ribbons she won, her first pair of shoes, her favorite stuffed animal and favorite jeans with the bedazzled pockets. Ian’s box has the tiniest mask when he had his very first of many surgeries. One of his surgeons actually saved his first stitches and saved them in the cutest little clear plastic box. I saved his favorite Teletubbie stuffie, his first Reebok tennis shoes, and coach pitch trophies. Baby books were stuffed with notes and mementos though Ian, the youngest, has less than Brandy. My daughter loves looking at all this stuff. My son…not so much but that could change when he’s older. I was the baby of 6 kids and born in 1963. My parents were practical (born during the depression) NOT sentimental. There was no baby book for me. All I have is my first baby bank (broken) and my favorite stuffed animal. I hope one day when I am gone they will look through those mementos I saved and smile and think of me.
Erin says
My mom give us each a photoalbum for Christmas a few years ago. My oldest sister’s was packed full with pics of her doing everything under the sun, then she was given an overflowing envelope of the extras. My other sister’s is full, no extras. Mine is about 1/2 full, pics of my sisters doing stuff and me in the background. My baby book has 1 entry.
Because of this I vowed to not do anything memory wise for my first I wasn’t prepared to do for any subsequent children… I bought a digital scrapbooking program and entered everything in her life as it happened… then the program went obsolete and I lost EVERYTHING! I went back and entered in her baby book everything I could remember, but my other two have way more in depth books. They all have the nicknames I have called them overtime and funny stories, who came to their parties and the songs I sang to sing them to sleep… oldest just has less milestones. They are 9, 4 & 3 now. I’ll keep adding and hopefully will even out in the end!
Laura says
Everywhere online every parent ever says how much more they did for their first child’s baby book, I really didn’t want my second child to feel overlooked or less.
But, I knew I wanted to have a second child close to my first and I had no idea how much energy I’d have for any of it. So I made notes for both my daughters on my phone. Now they are 4 and 6 and I am finally looking at making them up into books. Of course I have more information on my first daughter because I had more time! But, I’m just not going to put it all in! Haha. Simple as that. And as you said Kelle, I made a lot of notes that aren’t really necessary with my first! We too had a computer crash (actually we had both our phones crash at different times as well) so we lost quite a lot of pictures from different stages but I’ve managed to have a decent arrangement for both.
I think, even though I am not a scrapbooker (and don’t really understand the whole layers and layers of paper flowers or whatever with a little picture in the middle) I will do a few hand drawings on different pages. But if my sister had considered just scribbling notes and keeping them in a box she would definitely have more memories of her kids! She has nothing written down because the whole idea overwhelmed her but that would have been very achievable. Good ideas here! Thanks 🙂
Kymberly says
Okay I love this so much. You’ve convinced me. I am going to do this, this summer!!!
Tara Guffey says
My first child’s baby book is thoroughly detailed out and I still jot things in it to this day, she’s nine. My second child’s basically has his name and foot prints. I was so overwhelmed with how to accomplish it now, after the fact. He is 5. I’ve been checking my Facebook “memories” every day and jotting down things that I shared about him over the past 5 years. This has been a big help! My third child is only 3 months and I’m determined not to get behind. My favorite thing from my daughter’s baby book is the little blue bead that she got stuck in her nose when she was 2. My sister made fun of me for keeping it but my daughter and I laugh when we see it. Her baby book is something she absolutely loves and she drags it out all the time to show people.
angela says
Thanks so much for this post. I am going to create a personalized baby book using a blank sketchbook. I was sick of writing answers to questions didn’t apply, or had repetitive answers every month(like: they enjoyed eating).
This post really helped me to think of what is important to include.
Laura says
My sister and I when we were kids liked hearing about the names my parents considered for us and what we were almost called. I have made sure to keep a note of that for my kids. Also, I know a lot of people choose names before their kids are born, but if you are one who names them after then that’s usually a good story! I know a lot of other people who know the names their parents considered for them including if they had been the other sex etc (I was born at a time when most people didn’t know beforehand) so it must be a common thing for kids to ask.
I think also just general journalling – I read through some stuff I had written when my first was a baby and it was just what that day had been like. It wasn’t an exciting moment or a milestone but it really painted a picture of those earliest days.
shonell says
Love these tips, especially the idea of adding envelopes for keepsakes. And capturing the funny things kids say? Priceless! Thanks for the inspiration! 😄