Kelle, Author at Enjoying the Small Things

Pros and Cons of College Life with Kirsta Graf

February 23, 2018 By Kelle

You know how I know it’s going to be a good day? Because my intern is taking over this space today. I’m so happy to have Kirsta Graf back here today (she’s been busy at school!) talking about some pros and cons of college life and what she’s learning. If you’re new here, Kirsta has Down syndrome and is a first year student at Bethel University as part of their BUILD program. Bethel is one of the 267 universities in this country that offers inclusive higher education programs for people with intellectual disabilities. I had the opportunity last year to travel with Ruby’s Rainbow to witness Kirsta’s family drop her off at college (you’ll get to see all this next month, and you won’t want to miss it–tear jerker!), and now I’m so thrilled to have Kirsta share about her college experience here on the blog.

As Kirsta’s mom says, “It isn’t nothing” meaning it’s not like she dropped her off at college, waved goodbye and booked a cruise for Italy. There are a number of extra challenges, both for students and parents, that come with being a part of these programs, but Kirsta, her family and the university staff are committed to facing those challenges and finding creative ways to overcome them because they know that Kirsta’s future will benefit.

Kirsta’s mom shared, “A lot of the challenges that have come up at school are things we never thought to address with Kirsta. You don’t know what she doesn’t know until you find out that she doesn’t know it, if you know what I mean”–which is true of any child, but sometimes with intellectual disabilities, some of the secondary lessons you expect kids to pick up without having to literally lay them out need to be specified.

The wonderful thing about Kirsta’s college experience is that these life lessons are bubbling to the surface, giving everyone the opportunity to live through and learn them together, and the product is beautiful growth–sometimes in baby steps, sometimes in noticeable leaps. I’ve visited four colleges that offer these programs now, and I am so impressed with the staff that make them come to life. Expectations are high, and while all the resources these students need are provided, it can be challenging for parents to remove themselves as one of those resources to help their kids lean on the other ones they’re encouraged to use. Ultimate goal? More independence.

One of my favorite phone calls from Kirsta’s mom last year was when she called to tell me that Kirsta spent her monthly coffee shop budget in one week.

“Alicia,” I told her, “This is awesome. This means her college experience is just like everyone else’s because you do realize, thousands of other college freshman called their parents this year asking for more money because they were broke after the first week.”

And my favorite thing to hear about is how Kirsta, her family, peers and college staff work together to come up with creative strategies and accommodations to learn these lessons. I’ve tucked away many ideas, written things down and have been so encouraged by the lessons Kirsta is sharing. I know that we too will face these challenges in the future, and we will overcome them.

Today, Kirsta is sharing some pros and cons of college life and some of the things she’s learning.

Take it away Kirsta.

COLLEGE LESSONS I’VE LEARNED

Lesson 1:

College life is great because I get to go to a coffee shop called Royal Grounds a lot. I like to get Turtle Mocha or a Chai Tea or a Pumpkin Latte. BUT…
…sometimes I buy too much fancy coffee and I’m getting in trouble. I’ve had three in one day!

Lesson 2:

I love having fun and kind roommates. I have awesome girls on first floor Nelson Dorm! BUT…
…I missed my home and mom and dad and sisters. They miss me too, but they’re ok.

Lesson 3:

It’s awesome to climb a ladder into my cozy built-in bunk bed with a curtain. BUT…
it’s not fun to get the stomach flu away from home and throw up all over your bed (not so cozy then).

* Kirsta’s mom said she never thought about teaching Kirsta how to take care of herself when she’s sick, so they learned so many lessons this year!

Lesson 4:

I am proud because I have learned to do a Google calendar and I am good at it. I add things like, “Clean your glasses.” (my mom makes me.) BUT…
…sometimes I don’t check the Google calendar and I miss fun nighttime activities, like a Target run or a movie. And I have to clean my glasses!

Lesson 5:

It’ pretty cool that I get to make my own choices about a lot of things I want to do. My mom and dad could not tell me (ha!) BUT…
I had to learn to get up and be on time to class on my own. That’s been going ok. Now I’m an early bird. I always make it to breakfast.

Lesson 6:

My favorite is hanging out with friends from high school that go to Bethel. Especially “the guys”. BUT…
Learning to keep in my own space as a roommate is hard sometimes when you’ve had your own room.

Lesson 7:

It is helpful that my teachers really care and try to help me with my studies and learning to be independent. BUT…
My teachers don’t mess around. If we do something wrong or against the rules they are honest and we have consequences.

Lesson 8:

I had to do finals in my classes. I could Facetime my mom and dad and family if I was worried about finals, and I did fine. My sisters came to help me study too. BUT…
I was very nervous about finals. And I had a lot of tears about them. I sent A LOT of texts that said, “I’m nerves about finils.”

Lesson 9:

I live in a cool suite where I can watch movies and we have a coffee maker too. BUT…
It’s not my favorite to clean our room. We have to empty trash and vacuum and clean the bathrooms.

Lesson 10:

I love chapel and vespers and all the kind, loving, understanding students that Bethel has. AND…
I’m learning that I need also to be growing in love and kindness and thinking of others, not just myself.

I’m so grateful to have Kirsta in this space and can’t wait to share more of her journey with you. If you missed her first post, you can find it here. And it is my great pleasure to send Kirsta a check for every post she writes here. You can find out more about colleges that offer programs for people with intellectual disabilities at thinkcollege.net and more about Ruby’s Rainbow scholarship opportunities for people with Down syndrome here. Kirsta reads your feedback, and your words are encouraging and helpful. Tell us–what lessons do you remember learning in college and what challenges were particularly difficult?

Pooch Portrait Art

February 20, 2018 By Kelle

Okay, dog loving friends. Or cats. Or birds. Or whatever living creature it is that calls your place home and maybe–if he’s lucky–gets his name added to the holiday cards. So your pooch might not love when your kids are holding him hostage to dress him up in doll clothes. Here’s a chance for the kids to get what they want without the dog’s distress and the next rainy day activity–pooch portrait art. We made these this weekend, and we were dying laughing at how ridiculous Latte looks all dressed up–but also…So. Much. Fun. And don’t think for a second that you have to have kids as an excuse to make one of these. I think a whole gallery wall of these over a bar cart in a dining area or in a fun colorful bathroom would be hilarious.

Here’s what you need:

1 8 x 10 photo of your animal’s head
11 x 14 oval stretch canvas
Mod Podge (we used satin)
Decorative scrapbook paper
Accessories: felt, pom poms, glitter, bows, buttons, pearls, rhinestones, etc.

We used these 11 x 14 oval stretched canvases (ready to hang) from Hobby Lobby ($8.99 each but click on the “40% off one item GET COUPON” button at the top of the site, and you can either print the coupon to use in store or use the code online). I picked up two of Lainey’s friends this weekend and ran inside to get a picture of their dog, so they could each make one of their own dog (printed them 1 hour at Costco).

As for the pictures, you don’t need a studio backdrop, and you can zoom and crop later. Just make them sit, hold a treat and snap it fast. For moody cats, God speed, because I don’t know how to help you there. Here’s what we started with:

After you get your photo, crop and zoom so that just the head and neck area of your pooch fills an 8 x 10 print. Once it’s printed, cut out the head to be mounted on the canvas (wait to mount it though).

The fun part comes when you build your dog’s outfit and match their personality with paper patterns and clothing designs.

Before you mount the head, you’ll want to use it as a guide to cut out outfit shapes to see where necklines should fall. We didn’t have any stencils ,so we just winged it with trial and error for outfit details, but that made it even more fun. We started cutting out basic t-shirt shapes from the scrapbook paper to make the dress/sweater base and, trimmed them down and then added collars, buttons, bows, jewelry, etc. We didn’t adhere anything with Mod Podge until we had our entire design laid out. Once you know what you want, you can begin securing everything, starting with the bottom layer, with Mod Podge (only the flat items like paper and felt. Once everything dries, you can use hot glue to add your 3-D accessories like bows, buttons, pearls and rhinestones). Use Mod Podge like glue, brushing it on the back of each piece and securing it to the canvas, and then brush a layer of Mod Podge all over the top of the canvas for that decoupage effect (it will look murky but will dry clear).

Once it’s dry, hot glue your 3-D accessories in place–pom-poms, pearls, bow ties, buttons, etc.

I can’t take it. Latte’s ears. And Diesel is so dashing!

You should know that Lainey’s friends left their portraits to dry, and I kept them and hung them in my own house because I’m not, like, a regular mom. I’m a jackass mom.

(tried above Lainey’s desk first, but they were competing with that wallpaper a bit)

I’ll give them back eventually.

Brett wants me to make one for Sophie which I love so much, so I’m on it. Time to go through the old folders of Sophie photos (hold me).

Dash Five Years: A Handyman Tool Party

February 19, 2018 By Kelle

We celebrated Dash’s fifth birthday this past weekend with a Home Depot Handyman party that might go down in the history of Hampton kid parties as one of my top five favorites, but that’s a tough call. It’s just that little boys in hard hats and tool aprons slay me.

Also, my dad and Gary played a huge part in making this party memorable as they designed a building activity for the kids where they got to use tools to create a playhouse together. The sight of my dad teaching the kids how to hammer nails and letting them work the power saw will forever keep this party extra special in my memory.

We did a breakfast party again which I’m loving because it’s easy to plan the food, the moms huddle over brunch treats in my kitchen (which I love–it’s like two parties in one), and we still have the entire day when the party is over. Plus, the kids are happy and well rested in the morning, so there’s way less chance of a party meltdown.

We served egg cups (basically my egg casserole mix poured into cupcake tins), fresh fruit cups and donuts (cupcakes later), and I set up a bagel station where guests could toast and prepare their own bagel concoctions. I’ll totally repeat this menu for breakfast parties to come because it’s easy, and everyone finds something they like.

Dash wanted “tool cupcakes,” so I found these tool candy molds as well as a nuts and bolts one and used colored candy melts to make chocolate cupcake toppers. We found the chocolate rocks at Hobby Lobby (I’ll add a list of all the party goods with links and sources at the end of this post). I’m so happy with how they turned out.

Tool Sticker Activity Book

The Dollar Tree had the best selection of handyman supplies, so each of our party guests got a toolbox filled with safety goggles and a tape measure.

And Home Depot had the little tool aprons for only $.97 a piece. We slipped in two screwdrivers–a flat head and a Phillips, for all their handyman needs.

Free party decor = raid the garage.

Dash began counting down for this party two weeks ago, announcing the amount of days left until his party first thing every morning after he woke up.

My favorite part was watching the handymen go off to work…

My dad and Gary had everything planned perfectly. The first station was a hammer lesson. They set up a 2 x 4 with rows of roofing nails already started, so the kids got to take their turn with the hammer, seeing how many “bang-bangs” it took to drive the nail all the way in.

On the other end of the board were pre-drilled holes and screws ready to be tightened. The boys used their screwdrivers to secure the screws.

Next up was measuring. Using their tape measures and pencils, they took turns marking off assigned measurements…

…then carried the boards over to the saw station to be cut for the playhouse beams.

Once the beams were cut, the kids worked together to add the walls (pre-measured and cut by my dad before the party) and secure them all in place with screws, taking turns with the power drill.

You could certainly use weather-proof wood to build a real playhouse, but since we just wanted a fun party activity, we went with the cheapest building supplies–external siding. It will be repurposed for some signs my dad needs, so it’s not a total waste.

My face hurt from smiling when it was all built. Cutest thing ever, and the kids were so happy and in their element, proud to be given the opportunity to do some good hard work with grown-up tools.

Then there was the crew too little to get their contractor’s licenses, so they stayed in the house and played.

Nella could have assisted building, but there was a baby in sight, so…game over.

Dash was thrilled with all of it and so ridiculously happy to have his friends celebrate his day with him. I told Brett later, “This is the year. This is the one where his birthday means more to him than it probably ever will again.”

Also…no injuries! No flying hammers! Now if I could just put these little handymen to work on my bathroom that needs help. Here, let’s see how you work a sledgehammer.

Loving so much where we are at five years old…his little voice and daily inquiries and creative mind that does not stop. So thankful for this boy and everything he is.

Party Sources:

Tool Candy Mold: Amazon
Nuts and Bolts Candy Mold: Amazon
Chocolate Rocks: Hobby Lobby
Tool Sticker Albums: Amazon
Toolboxes and Tools: Dollar Tree
Plastic Hard Hats: Amazon
Orange Construction Vests (set of 3): Amazon
Tool Aprons: Home Depot
Dash’s Overalls: Target (no longer available, but these Dickies ones are and are handyman worthy)